Top Tips for Grooms
21 Things Every Groom MUST Know!
1. It's all about the bride! From deciding the date to the last dance of the evening, your job is to ensure the bride is happy. That means supporting her decisions regardless, fixing any problems that come up (ideally without her even knowing it's happened), and guarding her from anyone you know is going to make her blood boil on the day.
2. Have your say If you really want something or don't like something, don't keep quiet about it to keep your fiancée happy. But don't harp on about it for ever - once a decision is made, move on so you can enjoy the rest of the planning.
3. Discuss with your bride whether your suit is going to be a surprise or whether you're going to match a colour scheme. Most grooms are just left to it, but some idea of what the bride is expecting is wise.
The best way to ensure a good match for your wedding ties or cravats to a colour scheme is to get some swatches beforehand. Click here to select your colours and get some swatches to start with.
4. Choose your best man wisely! It's not just about who can organise the best stag do. A good best man needs to be able to help you, advise you and support you both before and during the day. Do you really want your bride upset because your best man is his usual drunk and disorderly self on the day?
5. Tidy yourself up. Get rid of that scraggly beard you've been trying to grow for years, cut your nails, have a haircut. It's one day, so get a manicure and a proper barber's shave - you'll feel great at the end of it!
A high quality shaving kit and manicure set will not only set you up perfectly for your wedding, but will also keep you in tip top shape for years to come.
6. Joke if you want about including "obey" in the vows, but be aware the joke wears out quickly...
7. Don't be an idiot on your stag night. No matter what your fiancée says, there's a pretty good chance she doesn't want to haul you out of jail the next day, or hear endless stories about what you got up to with a stripper. If she's really against something, don't do it, and make sure your best man is clear about it.
8. Write your speech. Then take out half the bad jokes and rewrite it. Discuss with your bride who is going to thank who (the bride usually makes a speech these days too), and make sure you get the thank you's in first. The very minimum you should have in your speech should include: thanking the bride's parents and the best man, a bit about your new bride and how amazing she is, and finally thank and toast the bridesmaids.
When writing and rehearsing your speech, be as natural as possible. It’s a lot easier if you talk as if you’re just chatting to friends.
9. If you're planning a surprise for your wedding day, make sure it's one your bride is going to love. She should never be embarrassed or humiliated, so you might think it's funny but no-one else does. Check YouTube to see just how badly it can go wrong...
10. No ex-girlfriends at the wedding! Really shouldn't have to be explained...
11. It's been said the worst thing about getting married is the people. There will be those that won't RSVP yet expect you to know they're coming, others that get shirty because you haven't invited the boyfriend they met just 24 hours ago, and others that put down everything you've planned for the wedding. Remember, this is your day, so be firm about what you want.
12. Plan your night before and transport to the church/venue. This is where your best man comes in again, so arrange for him to drive the two of you to the church so you don't need to stress about driving.
13. Create a checklist of things to remember for the morning of the wedding. It's a lot less stressful than trying to remember things, and you can be sure that way you have everything covered.
14. Calculate travelling time and then add 50%. The bride can be late. You can not! You will normally be told when you need to be at the venue, so make sure you're there on time.
Get there on time and spoil yourself a bit as well with a classic pocket watch. It looks good as well as getting you to the church on time!
15. On the day, take some time out with your bride, even for a few minutes. It can be a little crazy with every minute planned out and everyone wanting your attention, but find a break so the two of you can just enjoy your own company for a little while. Task the best man and bridesmaids with keeping everyone away.
16. Eat! Have a good breakfast - if your wedding is in the afternoon, this is probably the last chance you'll get to eat for a long time. And make sure you eat at the reception - it's very easy for the bride and groom to miss out and be starving before the party is over.
17. Dance with your wife! You're married now, don't be one of those guys that is too shy and stands on the sidelines watching. Dance with your new wife and enjoy it.
The first dance needn’t be a West End musical! Don’t knock the slow shuffle – you really can’t go wrong with it so it’s a safe option if you need it!
18. Be realistic about the wedding night. Yes, you know what I'm talking about. You will both be knackered and/or drunk from a long day, and it's not uncommon for one or both of you to just crash. That's ok, tomorrow's the first day as a married couple...
19. You probably won't have a chance to meet or speak to everyone on the day. There's not much you can do about that, but don't get stuck talking to one person who won't let you go. Make your excuses and move on so you can get around to more people.
20. Don't sweat the small stuff. Things go wrong, accept it, don't let it ruin everything. It's just one incident in a whole day, and your over-riding memory will undoubtedly be one of great happiness.
21. Get into the photos. Some photographers can keep you away from the festivities for ages, but smile and enjoy them. These photos are going to be with you forever, and one or some of them will end up as poster somewhere in your new house. You're going to want to look good in it if you're staring at it every day!
And a bonus number 22:
22. Enjoy it! That might sound a bit obvious, but too many people spend the day stressing about everything and forget to enjoy it. The whole occasion is truly quite brilliant, so take it all in and have fun.
Have a great wedding day!